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Inspiration

The blowback prizes in the tombola

Ambiorn Happy
Fridag in Aarhus

My doctor is harsh. It is impossible to get a prescription out of him, or an MRI scan, or just a quick heart operation. And I thought the doctors had a prescription pad built into their wrist and were only interested in selling as large quantities of medicine as possible.

"And take a deep breath! Very nice". The doctor moves the stethoscope around on my back. "And again yes. Fine".

I already fear his judgment, and it will fall promptly. "You're healthy and well, Ambiorn. It's just a bit of a cold, the lungs are fine though". He says it's good news, but I just feel really dizzy and sick. Maybe I'm a hypochondriac, I've thought that many times. No matter what I come crawling with, my doctor laughs and sends me back home.

My only hope eventually is that the wise will invent a medicine for hypochondria, or a fancy operation with big bandages and crutches. Maybe you don't feel that way, and that's because we're different.

I think it is wise to choose your problems carefully. At any point in life, there is a certain amount of problem-matter around us. A kind of tombola with shelves of problems that you can freely choose from. At the front of the shelves, the funfair man has written small notes on paper he has torn out of a square notebook.

It says:
* the body
* relationship
* work
* love
* sex
* children
* economy,
and then you'll have like a free choice on all the shelves.

None of us can overcome as many problems as the funfair man offers. That is why we choose the problems with which we would like to be burdened. Do you believe it? Among all the diseases of the world, and among the little blemishes of my body, I carefully chose to become a hypochondriac. It is indeed a disease that cannot be cured with medicine, but on the other hand it does not kill people either. Also, I've chosen a bad knee, which periodically proves me right that the world is a sorry place.

But then last night I was in a bad mood. I lay coughing, sick and ill, and thought of the funfair man's raffle. You know what? There are indeed many problems that have blowback benefits!

The blowback benefits of love include longing and infidelity. Fatigue and overtime are part of the job. To the wealth there is excess weight and waste. For every good thing in the world, the fair man has a few little problems on the shelf for you to choose! Or in other words: If you have a problem in life now, it comes from the fact that you previously got the main prize...

That thought only made my mood worse. I no longer have the main prize - only the blowback prizes are still on the window shelf. Little kitschy prizes in garish colors and plastic. Between them you can see markings in the dust from where the main prize was. They are really decorative, because otherwise this place would be so empty. But as such, no problem is worth collecting, so I took the funfair man figures and carried them down to the rubbish container.

Most problems are just a consequence of the good life. So the next time you win the raffle, make sure the funfar man doesn't sneak a few side prizes into the bargain. You just settle for the main prize and leave the blowbacks alone.

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